What's A Skoliosexual?
There's a lot more out there beyond "hetero," "homo" and "bi."
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Noah Michelson Voices Editorial Director, The Huffington Post
10/16/2015 09:55 am ET
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Updated
Oct 19, 2015
Miley Cyrus made headlines over the summer when she came out as pansexual, thereby introducing many people to a term that they may have heard before but don't entirely understand.
But pansexual is just one of many sexual and romantic identities that exist beyond more commonly known and discussed orientations like heterosexual, homosexual and bisexual. In fact, some people may not even know that a person can be romantically, as well as sexually, oriented. According to Asexuality.org, romantic attraction "is an emotional response that most people often feel that results in a desire for a romantic relationship with the person that the attraction is felt towards." The site notes that "many asexual people experience romantic attraction even though they do not feel sexual attraction" and though romantic and sexual orientations often "match," "it is common to find mixed combinations of romantic and sexual orientations" in the asexual community.
"A lot of people feel broken before they find a label and a community to go with it," Michael, a team member affiliated with the Asexual Visibility & Education Network (AVEN), which works to inform people about sexuality and identities which may fall under the asexuality umbrella. "Many asexual people feel they can't live up to the expectations of their friends, family and society, and are hugely relieved at finding out they're not alone," he added. "We hold that no-one can tell anyone else whom they are sexually attracted too, if any. Telling an asexual person they are not asexual is like telling a straight person they are gay or bi, or vice versa. Ultimately only the person in question is in a good position to know either way."
To help shed some more light on this subject matter, here are 12 terms related to sexual and romantic identities that are beginning to receive more attention in the media but that are still regularly absent or erased from conversations currently taking place in popular culture.
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AsexualDigital Vision. via Getty ImagesAn asexual is “someone who does not experience sexual attraction.” Asexuality.org also notes, "Asexuals may regard other people as aesthetically attractive without feeling sexual attraction to them. Some asexual people also experience the desire of being affectionate to other people without it being sexual. If you do not experience sexual attraction, you might identify as asexual."
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AromanticFuse via Getty Images"An aromantic is a person who experiences little or no romantic attraction to others,” according to Asexuality.org. The site also notes that “aromantics do not lack emotional/personal connection, but simply have no instinctual need to develop connections of a romantic nature. Aromantics can have needs for just as much empathetic support as romantics, but these needs can be fulfilled in a platonic way.” Being aromantic is usually “considered to be innate and not a personal choice,” in the same way that asexuality is considered innate.
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GraysexualBy Wunderfool via Getty ImagesJared, one man who identifies as graysexual, defines the term as a "magical place between asexual and someone who is sexual." The Frisky defines it as "something more fluid between sexuality and asexuality." Those who identify as graysexual might also identify as gay or straight or any other sexual identity inside or outside of the binary.
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DemisexualBetsie Van Der Meer via Getty ImagesSomeone who identifies as demisexual doesn’t typically feel sexual attraction unless they “have already formed a strong emotional bond with the person.” Asexualityarchive.com also notes that “the bond may or may not be romantic in nature.”
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DemiromanticCaiaimage/Tom Merton via Getty ImagesSimilar to a demisexual, the individual doesn’t feel romantic attraction “unless they have already formed a strong emotional bond with the person.”
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LithromanticDougal Waters via Getty ImagesAccording to asexuality.org, the term is described as “a person who experiences romantic love but does not want their feelings to be reciprocated.” The site also notes that lithromantic people “may or may not be ok with romantic relationships.”
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PansexualDreamPictures via Getty ImagesPansexual refers to those “who feel they are sexually/emotionally/spiritually capable of falling in love with all genders.”
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PolysexualDynamic Graphics via Getty ImagesSimilar to pansexual, a polysexual person “may be attracted to some gender variant people but not have the capability or desire to be with some others.”
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PanromanticAsia Images via Getty ImagesA person who is romantically -- but not sexually -- attracted to others regardless of sex or gender.
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SkoliosexualLeren Lu via Getty ImagesAccording to Genderqueerid.com, skoliosexual refers to “sexual attraction to non-binary identified individuals" or those who do not identify as cisgender. The site also notes that “this does not generally describe an attraction to specific genitalia or birth assignments but rather is an inclusive term.”
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Queerplatonic RelationshipsJupiterimages via Getty ImagesRelationships that “are not romantic in nature but they involve very close emotional connections that are often deeper or more intense than what is traditionally considered a friendship.”
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Zucchinidiego cervo via Getty ImagesThe name for a partner who is involved in a queerplatonic relationship, as in "he's my zucchini."
Also on The Huffington Post
28 Bisexual Celebrities
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Megan Fox
In a 2011 Esquire interview, Megan Fox confirmed her bisexuality, stating, "I think people are born bisexual and then make subconscious choices based on the pressures of society. I have no question in my mind about being bisexual. But I'm also a hypocrite: I would never date a girl who was bisexual, because that means they also sleep with men, and men are so dirty that I'd never want to sleep with a girl who had slept with a man."
AP
Megan Fox
In a 2011 Esquire interview, Megan Fox confirmed her bisexuality, stating, "I think people are born bisexual and then make subconscious choices based on the pressures of society. I have no question in my mind about being bisexual. But I'm also a hypocrite: I would never date a girl who was bisexual, because that means they also sleep with men, and men are so dirty that I'd never want to sleep with a girl who had slept with a man."
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Billie Joe Armstrong
The Green Day front man opened up about his sexuality in a 1995 interview with The Advocate: "I think I've always been bisexual. I mean, it's something that I've always been interested in. I think everybody kind of fantasizes about the same sex. I think people are born bisexual, and it's just that our parents and society kind of veer us off into this feeling of 'Oh, I can't.' They say it's taboo. It's ingrained in our heads that it's bad, when it's not bad at all. It's a very beautiful thing."
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Margaret Cho
Comedian Margaret Cho has long been open about her sexuality. In August 2013, Cho discussed the semantics surrounding her open marriage to artist Al Ridenour, saying that she's "technically not able to stay with one person sexually because I’m bisexual,” and joking that she just “can’t stop up that hole.” She also identifies as queer, and opened up about her sexuality in an interview with HuffPost Gay Voices Editor-At-Large Michelangelo Signorile.
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Clive Davis
Twice-married record executive and music mogul Clive Davis came out as bisexual in his 2013 memoir, The Soundtrack Of My Life. Davis opened up about two long-term relationships he had with men after his divorce from his second wife.
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Anna Paquin
Anna Paquin is adamantly open about her bisexuality. The actress told "Zooey" magazine in a 2009 interview, "For me, it’s not really an issue because I’m someone who believes being bisexual is actually a thing. It’s not made up. It’s not a lack of decision."
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Megan Mullally
After telling The Advocate in 2009 that she was bisexual, Mullally clarified her statements in an interview with Queerty, telling the blog: "I said that I thought that everybody is innately bisexual. I think there are different levels of awareness attached to that, so I may believe that everybody is innately bisexual, but somebody who is very homophobic may not see that quality in themselves in any way, shape or form. That’s on a very philosophical or even metaphysical level, you know what I mean? It’s not something that I think people are ready for yet. I think if you ask the average guy on the street if he was innately bisexual, he’d be like, ‘What the fuck are you talking about?’ and then he’d punch you in the face. So, we’re not quite there."
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Azealia Banks
The rapper has been openly bisexual since the early days of her career: "I mean, I'm bisexual, so it makes sense. But I don't want to be that girl who says all gays necessarily hang out together, of course! I have people say to me, 'Oh wow, my friend is gay, too,' and I'm like, 'Yeah, so?'"
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Andy Dick
Many people mistakenly assume that Andy Dick identifies as gay. However, he told The Washington Post in a 2006 interview that, "just because I've been with guys, and I'm bi, doesn't mean I'm gay."
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Bai Ling
Actress Bai Ling is openly bisexual -- and the identity category has often provided some humorous mix-ups involving her first name. According to GLAAD, she discussed it in-depth in a 2009 interview with Entertainment Weekly: "[A]t first when I was in the United States I didn't always have an interpreter in interviews and I didn't speak English so well. There was some confusion. My name is pronounced 'bi,' so when I was asked, 'Are you bi?' I said, 'Yes, I am Bai.' Do you like men? 'Of course!' Do you like women? 'Why yes!' And later I found out what that means and I said, 'Sure, I am bi!' But I think the interpreters and the reporters thought that I didn't know what I was saying because I was so open about it. They were uncomfortable about it. Such a thing is not important for me."
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Carrie Brownstein
The "Portlandia" star and former guitarist and vocalist for Sleater-Kinney is often assumed to identify as gay. However, she told "Willamette Week" in 2012 that, "It’s weird, because no one’s actually ever asked me. People just always assume, like, you’re this or that. It’s like, ‘OK. I’m bisexual.’”
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David Bowie
Though David Bowie has historically played coy surrounding his sexuality, he clarified the subject in a 1976 interview with "Playboy." "It's true -- I am a bisexual. But I can't deny that I've used that fact very well. I suppose it's the best thing that ever happened to me."
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Snooki
The always-polarizing guidette sat down with The Huffington Post in February 2012 and sought to clarify her sexual preference. "I would consider myself bi. I've done stuff with girls before. But I would never be with a girl because I like... penis. But I've experimented."
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Angelina Jolie
Angelina Jolie has been open about her sexuality for quite some time, having had numerous encounters and relationships with women, including model and actress Jenny Shimizu. She reportedly told OK Magazine that, "I have loved women in the past and slept with them. I think if you love and want to pleasure a woman, particularly if you are a woman yourself, then certainly you know how to do things a certain way."
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Evan Rachel Wood
Evan Rachel Wood came out on Twitter in 2012: “I myself am bisexual and have always ‘joked’ about Miley giving me gay vibes. Not a bad thing! Just an observation.”
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Amber Heard
Amber Heard has been openly bisexual for quite some time, and discussed this aspect of her identity in "Elle." The model and actress told reporters: "[I] didn't want to look like I was hiding anything."
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Sapphire
The author of Push, the book that inspired the critically acclaimed film "Precious," describes herself as bisexual.
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Drew Barrymore
Drew Barrymore originally came out in an interview in Contact Magazine in 2003, saying, "Do I like women sexually? Yeah, I do. Totally. I have always considered myself bisexual... I love a woman's body. I think a woman and a woman together are beautiful, just as a man and a woman together are beautiful. Being with a woman is like exploring your own body, but through someone else."
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Frenchie Davis
This former "American Idol" and "The Voice" contestant came out in 2012, telling her fans that she had been in a relationship with a woman for the past year.
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Vanessa Carlton
Musician Vanessa Carlton came out publicly at 2010's Nashville Pride, announcing to a crowd of 18,000 that, "I've never said this before, but I am a proud bisexual woman!"
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Fergie
The Black Eyed Peas front woman confirmed speculation surrounding her sexual identity in 2009 through an interview with The Advocate:
"Q: After you discussed past sexual experiences with women in an interview with 'The Sunin May,' headlines everywhere read, 'Fergie Admits She’s Bisexual!'
A: The funny thing is that I was very open and honest about that from the very beginning, and everyone was acting like it was some new trend. Go back four or five years, people, and you’ll see the same answer.
"
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Pete Townshend
In his memoir Who I Am: A Memoir by Pete Townshend, this musician confirmed that he is "probably bisexual" and cited his attraction to Mick Jagger, calling him "the only man I've ever seriously wanted to fuck."
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Tila Tequila
Tila Tequila is not one to shy away from anything. The former Myspace celebrity did several reality shows centered around identifying as bisexual, beginning with "A Shot At Love With Tila Tequila." She was also the girlfriend of Casey Johnson, the Johnson & Johnson heiress, who passed away in 2010.
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Amber Rose
Kanye West's ex-girlfriend has long been perceived to be openly bisexual without actually addressing the way she identifies. In an interview with Complex magazine, the model sought to clarify the rumors: "They label me a bisexual freak stripper that fucks Kanye on a daily basis. To answer that: I’m extremely open with my sexuality. I can be in love with a woman, I can be in love with a man. I’m not into bestiality, but as far as humans go, I definitely find beauty in everybody, whether they’re heavy-set, super-skinny, if they’re white, black, Indian, Asian, Spanish. I can see beauty in anybody. I’m not into threesomes or orgies and shit like that. If I see a women and I think she’s beautiful and I like her, and she likes me back we can definitely try to be in a relationship together."
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Cynthia Nixon
Currently married to wife Christine Marinoni, Nixon confirmed in a January 2012 interview with The Daily Beast that she is bisexual. The "Sex And The City" star stated, "I don’t pull out the 'bisexual' word because nobody likes the bisexuals. Everybody likes to dump on the bisexuals... We get no respect."
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Jillian Michaels
The first lady to ever come out in "Lady's Home Journal" as bisexual, "Biggest Loser" coach and personal trainer Jillian Michaels told the magazine in 2010: “Let’s just say I believe in healthy love. If I fall in love with a woman, that’s awesome. If I fall in love with a man, that’s awesome. As long as you fall in love… it’s like organic food. I only eat healthy food, and I only want healthy love!”
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Kim Zolciak
"Real Housewives Of Atlanta" star Kim Zolciak was in public relationships with both the mysterious "Big Poppa" and DJ Tracy Young before marrying Kroy Biermann. In a 2010 interview with Life & Style, interviewers posed the following question for the reality queen:
"Q: Do you feel you're giving a voice to other bisexual parents?
A: I'm among the millions of parents who have been in a gay or lesbian relationship. It hasn't been an easy road lately, but I feel there are no mistakes in my life. Everything happens for a reason. To have the opportunity to speak for myself and to have people understand what I'm going through is really special. I myself was confused and scared at first. Being able to speak from my heart and get this all out, it's a huge relief for me."
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Lady Gaga
Lady Gaga has been open for quite some time about her bisexuality, initially coming out in a 2010 interview with Barbara Walters.
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'Mama June' Shannon
The star of "Here Comes Honey Boo Boo" revealed that she's bisexual in an "Inside Edition" interview in April 2015. Her daughter "Pumpkin" Lauryn Thompson also came out as bi at the same time.
Charles Norfleet via Getty Images
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